Biden Announces Next First Lady Will Be a Black Woman
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Brace yourself, America, for another groundbreaking promise from President Joe Biden! After already vowing to rebuild infrastructure,…
Scientists Admit They Experiment on Rats Out of Sheer Resentment
WORLD — A shocking admission made by hundreds of the world’s top scientists revealed that for all these years, scientists…
Man Upset Waiter’s Sudden Cardiac Arrest Caused Delay in Food Service
MOESBURG, Ok. — In a world where instant gratification is the norm, where microwave meals have become the culinary holy…
Natalie Portman Just Realized She Isn’t Keira Knightley While Reading Her Own Wikipedia Page
HOLLYWOOD, Ca. — In a bizarre and mind-boggling twist of self-discovery, Academy Award-winning actress Natalie Portman recently stumbled upon a…
Father Angry that Son Is Wasting Lovely Sunny Day by Being in Coma
MOESBURG, Ok. — While families all over Moesburg enjoy the long-awaited pleasant weather, a local father is expressing his deep…
Sun-Maid Announces Girl on Raisin Box Has Skin Cancer
FRESNO, Ca. — Sun-Maid raisins has made a jaw-dropping announcement that has left the world reeling. The beloved girl on…
Man Dedicates Life to Helping People Like Himself
KEY WEST, Fl. — In a world full of self-made millionaires, influencers, and gurus, there is one man who stands…
Rehabilitated Gazelle Released Back into Food Chain
ATBARA, Sudan — In a stunning display of human-animal camaraderie, a heroic gazelle has been released back into the wild…
High School Student Fails Spanish Class in Protest of Gendered Words
MOESBURG, Ok. — A local high school student has decided to take a stand against the gender binary invading every…