In a shocking study, scientists have found the unexpected correlation between wearing eyeglasses and having bad eyesight. In simple terms, it means if you wear glasses, you are significantly more likely to have naturally bad eyesight.

“I’m flabbergasted,” said John B., 37, who has worn glasses since age 11. “I mean, I didn’t think my vision was worse than anyone else’s – I just thought the doctors just decided I would look good in glasses. And this whole time, I thought the numbers 20/20 and such were just ratings on how good people looked.”

“For years, I thought it was a government ploy to cover up UFOs,” said Alex J.

“And all this time, I thought it was the mark of the Beast,” said Mary P., 73. “But I decided to risk it. And now I can read my Bible again. Now that I’ve read Revelations again, I know that the mark of the Beast also goes on the hand. Nobody wears glasses on their hands. And nobody wears them on their forehead.”

Take this as a warning; if you wear glasses, you might want to get your eyes checked.

The consensus is currently unclear for contact lens users.