Topeka, KS — Marcus Belford, a middle school basketball coach, has been deemed “unfit for the job” after repeatedly failing to throw the basketball through the hoop. Belford, however, has assured the kids he coaches, as well as their parents, that he was only demonstrating how not to shoot a basket properly.

“The kids need not only to be shown what to do, but they also need to be shown what not to do. I’m simply demonstrating the latter.” Despite this obviously honest and 100% true assurance, many of the players Belford coaches still believe he is a terrible coach.

“He’s a really nice guy and all,” said 12 year old Owen Belford, who plays on the team and is also the nephew of Marcus Belford. “He’s always a lot of fun, but when it comes to basketball, he’s not so great. I mean, you can see he’s trying really hard, but he just can’t do it. I wouldn’t say this to his face, but he basically completely sucks at basketball. Please don’t tell my mom I said that.”

Despite the harsh comments from parents and athletes, Belford says he will continue to coach middle school basketball because it is his passion.

At publishing time, Belford was overheard saying, “Okay guys, pay attention, because I’m gonna do it for real this time!” while attempting a four yard free throw for the eighth time.